|Negative Comment||To keep safe ...||My strength is ...||As a result of the abuse ...|
|"You're a trouble maker."||I need to defend myself against my partner's accusations.||I have my own opinions and ideas.||I'm made to feel responsible for his problems.|
|"Your expectations are too high."||I need to develop healthy boundaries and learn what it means to "not enable" abuse.||I am becoming more educated, through God's word, regarding his view of healthy relationships.||I have been weakened physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.|
|"You aren't submissive enough."||I need to focus on submitting to Jesus first.||I read the Bible and pray to God for discernment.||I have allowed my partner's toxic lifestyle (music, words, behaviors) to hurt my relationship with God.|
"You pay too much attention to your partner's feelings. You're too sensitive."
|I focus on my partner's moods to anticipate explosions.||I care about my partner.||I am unable to pay attention to my personal needs.|
|"You are too self-focused and wasting time with writing things down in journals - keeping a record of wrongs. You are stuck in the paralysis of analysis."||I write things down for the purpose of identifying patterns of behavior.||I care about truth vs. basing my conclusions on emotions alone. I know that God cares about truth as well.||I'm made to feel that I'm making things up.|