How to Answer People Who Challenge Your Choices As You Strive to Deal with Abuse

Negative Comment To keep safe ... My strength is ... As a result of the abuse ...
"You're a trouble maker." I need to defend myself against my partner's accusations. I have my own opinions and ideas. I'm made to feel responsible for his problems.
"Your expectations are too high." I need to develop healthy boundaries and learn what it means to "not enable" abuse. I am becoming more educated, through God's word, regarding his view of healthy relationships. I have been weakened physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
"You aren't submissive enough." I need to focus on submitting to Jesus first. I read the Bible and pray to God for discernment. I have allowed my partner's toxic lifestyle (music, words, behaviors) to hurt my relationship with God.

"You pay too much attention to your partner's feelings. You're too sensitive."

I focus on my partner's moods to anticipate explosions. I care about my partner. I am unable to pay attention to my personal needs.
"You are too self-focused and wasting time with writing things down in journals - keeping a record of wrongs. You are stuck in the paralysis of analysis." I write things down for the purpose of identifying patterns of behavior. I care about truth vs. basing my conclusions on emotions alone. I know that God cares about truth as well. I'm made to feel that I'm making things up.